Pt 3: How to Recognize Signs of Mental and Emotional Abuse-S04E11

Recorded: 10/17/2021 / Published: 4/25/2022
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  • In this week’s episode of The Krypt we are diving heavily into psychology today in an attempt to help people recognize abusive relationships and get out of them. 
  1. Safe, sane, consensual, and informed
  2. KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity
  3. “Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Young
  • “How to Recognize the Signs of Mental and Emotional Abuse-S04E10” 
      1. Medically reviewed by Timothy J. Legg, Ph.D., CRNP — Written by Ann Pietrangelo — Updated on December 6, 2018
      2. https://www.healthline.com/health/signs-of-mental-abuse?fbclid=IwAR1TSnF_j8kYoAgmVxYBF0Bs7A2Iup-4eZA4igXfeO2-QMHk7mRo7rBnFqM  
  • Overview

You probably know many of the more obvious signs of mental and emotional abuse. But when you’re in the midst of it, it can be easy to miss the persistent undercurrent of abusive behavior.

Psychological abuse involves a person’s attempts to frighten, control, or isolate you. It’s in the abuser’s words and actions, as well as their persistence in these behaviors.

The abuser could be your spouse or other romantic partner. They could be your business partner, parent, or a caretaker.

No matter who it is, you don’t deserve it and it’s not your fault. Continue reading to learn more, including how to recognize it and what you can do next.

  • What to do

If you’re being mentally and emotionally abused, trust your instincts. Know that it isn’t right and you don’t have to live this way.

If you fear immediate physical violence, call 911 or your local emergency services.

If you aren’t in immediate danger and you need to talk or find someplace to go, call the National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 800-799-7233. This 24/7 hotline can put you in touch with service providers and shelters across the United States.

Otherwise, your choices come down to the specifics of your situation. Here’s what you can do:

    1. Accept that the abuse isn’t your responsibility. Don’t try to reason with your abuser. You may want to help, but it’s unlikely they’ll break this pattern of behavior without professional counseling. That’s their responsibility.
    2. Disengage and set personal boundaries. Decide that you won’t respond to abuse or get sucked into arguments. Stick to it. Limit exposure to the abuser as much as you can.
    3. Exit the relationship or circumstance. If possible, cut all ties. Make it clear that it’s over and don’t look back. You might also want to find a therapist who can show you a healthy way to move forward.
    4. Give yourself time to heal. Reach out to supportive friends and family members. If you’re in school, talk to a teacher or guidance counselor. If you think it will help, find a therapist who can help you in your recovery.
    5. Leaving the relationship is more complex if you’re married, have children, or have commingled assets. If that’s your situation, seek legal assistance. Here are a few other resources:
      1. Break the Cycle: Supporting young people between 12 and 24 to build healthy relationships and create an abuse-free culture.
      2. DomesticShelters.org: Educational information, hotline, and searchable database of services in your area.
      3. Love Is Respect (National Dating Abuse Hotline): Giving teens and young adults a chance to chat online, call, or text with advocates.
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